Permanency and exploration.

Warn before hand all, I’ve got ADD and a learn disability that in the past (far past lol) the school I went to only said it was a problem with my tracking in reading and never told me more. Both of these together make my writing hard to read these days since I general don’t see many errors at all not matter how many time I proofread things. So it may cause headache and people with OCD to have issues, you were warned.


So just watch softpapa aka Kurt Bell’s last Japan Hike video and His one on getting rid of his library and was think about those and he’s previous videos. It got me think about he seem happy with constant changes in his life, and maybe on some level he needs that.

On the other hand I’ve spent most of my life moving from one city/town to the next. One year I went to 4 (or was it 3, number doesn’t really matter) different school in that year. And I’m sick of that life style.

For myself while I love exploring, seeing, and experience new things, I like have a home to go back to. I spend most of my time exploring even in video games even but it drives me nut when I don’t have a “home”, a place to return to, even though it’s only a video game.  Anymore in my life I seek permanency.

If I ever get a chance to move to Japan to work like I want to, find I like there and I can survive there then I will do what I can to stay permanently.  Anymore I just want to find a place I can belong and then stay there for the rest of my life.

Which is weird since I’ve always dreams of exploring the stars, but anymore when people describe how might do that in current time I’ve realized I’d never be able to. Simple because every method they describe means leaving earth for ever or so long you personally would never return. And that thought scares and saddens me. While it’s unlike mankind will explore the stars in my lifetime even if they do there would be no place for me in such a experience.

I seek permanency so much anymore I couldn’t follow my dream if the possibility ever was given to me.

Now I dream that someone in my lifetime would develop a way to build secondary body (organic or machine doesn’t matter) that could be link with your original and your could be in multiply places at once. Maybe using a unknown Quantum or psychic link. Guess even if I find permanent home for myself I’ll just keep on dreaming.

Edit: Course not 5 minutes after I complete this I find Kurt has post another video lol. This one also bough my thought back to this topic. Try as I may to find a way to reduce items and stuff I have I can never seem to do it. For myself the thought of have massive library seem pleasant to me since for myself it represents permanency. All that items I have represent my past and are in many ways a anchor for me to hold on to. They never change and are always with me even if I didn’t have a permanency in where I was living.

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